


Helpless

by novvabeam



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Domestic Fluff, F/M, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Strangers to Lovers, but rly it's all fluff, slight angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-09
Updated: 2021-01-10
Packaged: 2021-03-13 15:42:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,578
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28655904
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/novvabeam/pseuds/novvabeam
Summary: loosely based off of 'helpless' from hamilton, following ushijima and you through different points in your relationship.
Relationships: Tendou Satori & Ushijima Wakatoshi, Ushijima Wakatoshi/Reader
Comments: 1
Kudos: 18





	1. you walked in and my heart went boom

**Author's Note:**

> hello!! this is 1/2 of a series i've finished n am now posting w ushi and oikawa featured!! i hope you enjoy <3 i wrote it a long time ago so it might not be all that great

Ushijima sees you as sunshine and flowers. He sees you as support and tenderness.

  
Your liveliness, your modesty, your kindness; he sees something pure, beautiful, and ultimately, perfect. He’s so lucky to have met you, and he knows it -- especially since he never would have introduced himself in the first place had it not been for you.

  
He had noticed you before, the way you would nudge him softly and slide your notebook over to him in class, because god knows he wasn’t paying attention to what was on the board, he was just thinking about the practice he had later that evening. You didn’t even know him, had never talked to him before, but something in your brain told you that the boy next to you was probably going to fail the class if you didn’t intervene. He whispers a low “thank you”, paying attention to your writing, how planned out and meticulous your note-taking was, several different colors adorning the page. If he wasn’t so confused by the odd wave of feelings that rushed over him, Ushijima would say it was cute.

  
He only actually talks to you when you come to one of his practices, a camera looped around your neck and notebook tucked under your arm. You tell him you’re Y/N, from your university’s newspaper, and you’d really love to sit in on a few of his practices to take some pictures for a volleyball spread, and maybe an interview, if he’s up for it. 

  
Ushijima’s confused at first, his brows furrowing a bit because he doesn’t realize why you’d want an interview with him out of all the people on his team, until he remembers he’s the university’s new rookie ace who everyone’s had their eye on since he was in high school. He nods down at you then, his low voice feeling like it’s rumbling right through you, “Yeah. That’d be fine. Do you want to do it after practice, or?” 

  
You smile brightly, then, and Ushijima is very confused as to why it makes the sides of his mouth quirk up too -- maybe it’s because you look more radiant than the sun right now, but he can only process that as a fact, not as a thought of affection.

  
“Perfect! Thank you so much -- and, ummm, after practice should be good! Do you mind if we go to the cafe next door? It’s still on campus so it won’t be too much of a walk, but I figured it’d be more comfortable to do an interview somewhere where we can sit down.” He realizes you’re rambling but he doesn’t really mind; he enjoys the company of people who can talk a lot, being a man of few words himself. Instead he simply nods, letting you talk; when he sees how brightly you smile and how animatedly you talk, his brows furrow, looking at you with a sort of bewilderment. He feels the same type of adrenaline-rush-excitement he does before he goes into a game, but he can’t quite understand why -- but before he can figure out why and before you can figure out why he’s looking at you so oddly, his coach is yelling at him to get back to practice. 

  
His practice goes by quick, and you get some breathtaking shots of him. When he’s up in the air he looks so graceful but somehow so strong; you snap pictures of him soaring, connecting with the ball to form hits you know could break your arm if they hit you the wrong way. You can feel your cheeks heating up as you watch him through your lens, fighting back the mixed expressions of excitement and awe that threaten to bloom on your face. This feeling, though, unlike with Wakatoshi, isn’t lost on you. You know what it is, because you’ve felt it every time you see him staring off into nothing in class, every time he tilts his head in confusion at his paper or slyly plugs his headphones into his laptop and changes his tab to watch volleyball highlights. You initially chalk it up to admiration about how driven he is, but you know it’s something more when you catch yourself studying the way his hair falls and the way his lips move when he’s mouthing the words of his textbook (he does that often, you note, probably to help him retain information better).

  
And yes, you might have jumped at the chance to take on the volleyball spread when your advisor pitched the idea, knowing you’d be able to watch the boy you had only ever had chance interactions with. Yes, you might have jumped for joy when you realized that he was the ace, a superstar one no doubt, meaning it wouldn’t seem weird for you to single him out for an interview. 

  
Yes, your interview goes well with him, and you can’t keep the radiant smile off of your face. He notices how gentle you are when you speak to the waitress about your order, how soft yet somehow firm you speak, how it seems you command the entire room so elegantly in your flowing sundress. Still, though, Ushijima thinks of these as facts -- unchanging, obstinate, and simply true, devoid of any emotional bias. He doesn’t fail to notice, though, how his heart races when you hand him his coffee cup and your fingers brush, or how his mind feels hazy when you speak with that beautiful lilt, or how he suddenly short circuits when you look him directly in the eyes and smile that ridiculously beautiful smile of yours while you bring your mug up to take a sip of your tea. He takes note of all these, but doesn’t quite understand what it is just yet -- he’s really only ever felt these ways before a game, but he’s smart enough to know you’re not the same as volleyball. 

  
Soon enough the interview turns into more casual talking -- about your majors, about how you’re much more passionate about your photography and art than your current pre-med track, about how he thinks you should just go for it (because he’s not really used to being in something that isn’t a guaranteed success for him), and about how you can’t really do that, though your soft smile betrays how endearing you think it is that he thinks you could ever succeed in something like that. You manage to pull a bit more words out of him than he was expecting, prompting him to talk about his high school days and how he intends to go pro. 

  
You both leave feeling content; you ask for his number, to follow up on some of his answers for clarification and also to arrange a study session, brought on by you giving him a gentle nudge and reminding him that there is a GPA requirement to stay on the volleyball team, wonderboy (he didn’t react badly to the nickname, which both surprises and elates you). While he leaves feeling emotions he’s never truly felt before, you leave with your heart fluttering and eyes gleaming. 

  
Because yes, you think you have a huge crush on the wonderboy that is Ushijima Wakatoshi, and honestly? You don’t really mind it.


	2. be true

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter 2 i forgot to upload yesterday <3

Since that first interview, you were showing up at his practices and games often, the old excuse of “it’s for the paper” seemingly worn out when he asks, “Didn’t the spread come out last week?” 

After that you had to be more upfront when talking and hanging out with him, but it all came naturally, and your friendship blossomed rather quickly -- study sessions at the cafe turned into hangouts at his apartment, and you began to leave your camera at home when you went to his practices in favor of studying every part of how he moved to commit to memory. 

You two continue on like this for longer than you’d like to admit (nearly a year and a half), both of you falling head over heels for each other and wondering how the hell you were going to deal with it. Surprisingly enough, the one who actually gets you together is Tendou, who has slowly begun to worm his way into your frequent hangouts. 

After one where he realizes you make Ushijima genuinely happy -- huge smiles, uncharacteristically loud laughs, the works -- he presses his friend about it, telling him to “make the move, Waka, she won’t be there forever.” 

So he did, one study date when he catches himself staring at you more than he usually does, and he knows it’s the right time.

“Y/N, I like you.”

“Like? In what way?”

“Romantically.”

“You better not be messing with me, Wonderboy, or i’ll--”

“We both know you can’t fight me.”

“No, but I can make you fail a class.”

From then on you’re his girlfriend, and you relish in the way you can bring out his soft side, clinging onto his arm and bringing him down to your eye level to give him eskimo kisses. You attend every single one of his games, becoming a ‘team mom’ of sorts and helping out wherever needed. You continue to help him study, and with incentives like ‘every right answer earns you a kiss’, his grades begin to soar.

Everything seems perfect, though Ushijima begins to notice that you’re giving more than taking, and it doesn’t sit right with him. Wakatoshi is nothing if not observant, and he notices that something is different about you. Your usual vibrancy seems to be duller, and though you’re still the most radiant thing in the room to him, he notices you’re carrying yourself differently. He can tell something is  _ off,  _ but he can’t for the life of him figure out what.

You don’t bring it up until he asks you about it one night while you two are cuddling on his couch, wanting to know why you seem so down lately. It only takes that one question for you to break down in his arms, curling up on his lap as wet tears soak his shirt.

“Lately you’ve kind of been ditching me for volleyball, and I get it, it’s your life and I need to accommodate that, but it’d be nice to have some us time every so often, you know? And, like, usually that doesn’t bother me, but lately i’ve been really down because I don’t know what the  _ fuck  _ i’m doing with my life, Ushi, I don’t want to be a doctor or do whatever the hell my parents want me to do, so i’m putting everything into you and  _ your  _ life because you do know what you’re doing and where you’re going. But it’s tiring sometimes, ‘Toshi, it is, because I feel like I never have time for myself anymore and i’m not  _ doing  _ anything for myself anymore and it’s my fault for taking so much on and never telling you, I know it is, but I didn’t want to distract you from volleyball because I know how much it all means to you and --”

He lets you ramble like this for a few minutes, his hand on the back of your head softly running through your hair, his other arm looped around your waist to keep you close. Ushijima’s heart breaks a little as he hears you speak through choked sobs, knowing that this is partially his fault; if he hadn’t neglected you so much for volleyball maybe you’d have felt safe enough to talk about this with him if he wasn’t so caught up in his sport all the time. Yes, this was what he was pursuing in life, but that didn’t mean you were to be put on the backburner because of it. 

Ushijima knows you’re done when he hears you sniffle and curl into him a bit more, shoving your face in his neck and apologizing meekly for “ruining his shirt”. At that he just chuckles, the low vibrations rumbling throughout his chest and making you melt into him. 

He eventually pulls you back to look at him, hands moving up to cup your face and thumbs wiping any leftover tears away. “Look, Y/N,” he starts, and you’re nervous for a second, beginning to open your mouth to speak again. He shushes you, soft and comforting, “I love you, alright? And I really am sorry I haven’t been showing it enough to you lately...I will be better, okay? I promise. And about everything else...you can talk to me. Always, even if I might not be there in the moment, I’ll make it up to you later. I am  _ never  _ going to let you think you’re a second choice for me.”

Ushijima pauses for a second before delivering his next words, knowing that he won’t be able to take it back once it falls from his lips, “And don’t worry about the future. Do what is going to make you happy, okay? No matter what your family says -- -- don’t give me that look, just listen. I’ll make sure we’re  _ both  _ taken care of. I promise.” 

That promise feels as real as it can get, and Wakatoshi makes good on it. He’s more attentive now, his observant nature coming in handy -- before he could only tell when something is wrong, but now it’s like he can always tell  _ why,  _ too. He knows exactly what to do for each situation, whether it be parents, school, stress, or work. You continue going to his games but it feels like less of a chore now, especially because he’s now coming to your art exhibitions, supporting you just as much as you are him. Your relationship is no longer all one-sided give, but a healthy balance between give and take. 

Slowly he begins to see your radiance return, the brilliant light you give off shining even brighter. You start wearing your dresses again, start smiling even more than usual, and it’s obvious you’ve finally learned to put yourself first sometimes. Ushijima’s in awe of how someone could be so perfect, so beautiful, and somehow all his. 

There’s something so special about a relationship built on endless love, trust, and adoration, and it seems like you and Wakatoshi have perfected it. 

Another year passes and you two are getting ready to graduate college. You’ve persuaded your parents to actually be supportive of your passion for art, and he’s getting ready to go pro, already getting offers from countless teams. You visit each other’s families often, both sides asking when you’re going to tie the knot, your parents asking when you’re going to give them a grandkid. You politely turn them down, saying you’re not trying to move too fast yet. Hell, you’ve barely even moved in with each other.

Unbeknownst to you, Ushijima’s been thinking of marriage for a while; he’s always known you were the one for him, exactly the type of woman he pictured himself marrying. He could picture your kids running around in the backyard while you lean against the doorframe with a small smile on your face, glowing with motherhood. He could picture himself coming up behind you and settling his hands on your waist, basking in the love you exude for your rambunctious children, all accentuated by a beautiful orange sunset and cool dusk air. 

That is, of course, why he asked Tendou to help him pick out a ring. He wants to get the biggest diamond he can, though Tendou immediately chimes in with a, “That’s tacky, Waka, Y/N doesn’t like tacky.” 

He settles on a dainty ring, one he knows will look perfect on your finger -- it’s got a beautiful medium-sized diamond in the middle, with small pale yellow gemstones set throughout the band. He wanted to incorporate your favorite color in a way that wouldn’t look too flashy. It’s perfect. 

He keeps the ring for a bit, waiting for just the right moment to ask you, but it seems like it never comes. 

That is until one night he’s at a game and looks up into the stands, expecting your familiar smile and seeing nothing. Wakatoshi frowns -- you hadn’t told him you weren’t coming today. 

Regardless, he keeps playing just as well as he always does, knowing he can’t let it affect him too much, but he’s so confused as to why you’d choose not to come so randomly. He can’t stop thinking about it.

You’re at home hyperventilating because the pregnancy test in your hand says positive. 

You’re on the phone with your best friend (who had recently gotten pregnant too, apparently), hands and voice shaking, “What if I ruin his career.”

“Y/N, you’re not going to ruin his career with a kid, it’s not like you’re a side bitch.”

“Okay, yeah,  _ thanks,  _ I know, but I mean what if he drops it to help take care of the kid? Who am I kidding, Toshi wouldn’t do that, I just --  _ agh.  _ I don’t wanna inconvenience him, you know?” 

“Y/N, it’s your  _ child.  _ You can’t inconvenience him with a child.”

“Yes, I can! And scouts are going to be at his game today, and I can’t just  _ tell him,  _ because if it throws him off his game he’s  _ screwed,  _ and --”

“Y/N, baby, stop with the anxiety thoughts and just tell him. I  _ promise you,  _ if anything it’ll just make him work ten times harder. Please? Get your stuff and go to the game, he’s probably missing you right now.”

She may be saying this because she’s known about his marriage plans for the past few months, but she’s not going to say that. 

You take her advice and run to the game anyway, though, holding the test in your purse. You get there right when it ends, and (thankfully) Ushijima’s team won, almost guaranteeing he’d be in a good mood. 

You’re tapping your foot and biting your lip as you wait for him outside of the locker room, his teammates all leaving before him. They greet you with various “hi”’s and small talk as they go, each passing member making you more impatient. Where the  _ hell  _ is your boyfriend?

You get the answer five minutes later -- he comes out with wet hair and a towel around his neck, indications he had just showered. His face, which was previously screwed up in concern, lights up when he sees you, a wide smile adorning his beautiful features. You let out a breath you didn’t know you’d been holding. 

It’s time.

“Wakatoshi, I’m--”

“Y/N, where were you today? I was so worried, I thought something happ--”

“I’m pregnant.”

He stops, looking at you with wide eyes. “What?”

“I’m pregnant. You know, with child. It’s yours, obviously.”

“Really?”

“You’re scaring me.”

He picks you up, then, spinning you around and lifting you up high in the air, his shocked expression turning into one of pure happiness. You don’t think you’ve ever seen him look so … ecstatic. You don’t know why, but to him this is the best opportunity he could’ve been given.

“We need to get married now.” He states as he puts you down, as if it’s the most factual thing he’s ever said.

“Toshi, I don’t want you to marry me because you think you have to. I know it’s the traditional thing to do with a kid and all, but --” 

He cuts off your new wave of rambling by fishing something out of his gym bag, and all of a sudden your eyes are going wide as he goes down on one knee. 

“You know, I thought I was stupid for carrying this around in here, but it seems it was a perfect decision…” He mutters to himself. The world seems as if it’s going in slow motion, and all you can do is cover your mouth with your hands while tears prick your eyes. 

“Y/N, I love you. You know that, and you know I would do anything for you. You’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever had the honor of meeting, both inside and out. Something about you has drawn me to you ever since we first met, and I’ve been addicted ever since then. The fact that you deal with me, social awkwardness and all, means the world to me, and you’ve never failed to support me even when I couldn’t do the same for you. You are the most kind, loving, and caring individual I have had the pleasure of knowing so intimately, and I want to spend the rest of our lives by your side. Before you say anything, I have had this ring for a while now, and I have already gotten your parent’s blessing, I’ve just been waiting for the right time. And it’s now.” 

You gasp as he opens the ring box, the glint of the diamond making the tears fall freely now. You really never have been good at hiding your emotions, as overwhelming as they are. 

“Y/N L/N, will you marry me?”

Of course you say yes, pulling him up and jumping in his arms as soon as he slides the ring on your finger. As you swing around in his arms, you’re silently thanking your best friend for pushing you to tell him. She must have known.

This may not have been the romantic and elegant proposal Ushijima hoped for, but you both agree it’s your own little slice of perfect. It’s  _ yours.  _

You’re marrying the wonderboy that is Ushijima Wakatoshi, and you couldn’t be happier.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comments/kudos are always dearly appreciated! once again, thank u for getting this far <3

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for getting this far! i appreciate you and comments/kudos are always adored! <3


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